Waiting

Life is very busy, in a great way, filled with new things.  New job, which I start in a week.  New kid, who's an absolute pleasure, and  a new rhythm to life, which is a little disconcerting.  People tell you your life changes, but it feels like a platitude.

It's not.  Life is now totally revolving around taking care of one little human.  And while that is as gratifying as they say, it's a real huge total seizmic change.  And you just can't prepare for it.

All of it's great though because it distracts from the waiting.  Have they received my manuscript? Should I remind them? Will they call today and say maybe?  Will they write and say no. Will a rejection just be flat, or will they at least say what they liked? 

So at least I've got plenty of distractions.  :)

Conversations

The following is typed while minding a baby, and therefore not as gramatically correct as migjht otherwise be expected.

3 Weeks ago

Agent:  Let me see your Full

Me (internal) SHIIIIIIT!!!  This is it, the dream, I've only written the best book ever.  Oh, but I was just editing the ending, because it wasn't 'bang' enough.  I'll ask her to wait.

Me - checks internet.

Internet:  Don't wait.  Agents hate that shit.

Me (internal) fuck you internet, you've been wrong before. You're not the boss of me.

Me (to Agent):  Can you wait? I've just had a baby - so I'm not exactly talking to other people at the minute - I won't query any one else in the meantime.

Internet:  Don't tell agent's you've been unsuccesful in talking to other agents

Me (internal) didn't I tell you to GTFO internet?

Agent (relaxed and cool) Dude, no worries, throw it over when it's as good as you can make it.

Me:  Cool, thanks.

1 Week Ago 

Me:  Here's that manuscript you requested, fully edited, and as good as I can make it.

Agent:  We don't reply to requests, but I'm probably already loving it. But you can't hear me loving it, but trust me, I probably am.

Today:

Me (Internal) You know, I really enjoyed re-editing my book.  I actually forgot how good it was.  I should query more agents.

Me (good angel) You said you wouldn't query anyone else

Me (bad angel) Yeah, but it's a reallly good book.  Share it with the world!!!

Good angel winning right now.  I am Mr goody two shoes.

Re-reading the Princess Bride

God DAMN!

If you haven't read this, shame on you...

Good things happen in threes?

So, I had another post in mind. For about a month infact. I'll parahprase it, feeling bad is bad. 

OK, that's too short.  I did a book swap and I didn't like it. The other author's writing style was too different, and I had to tell him to abort the swap.

He was pleasant about it, but I felt bad. And it was discouraging for me.

But (considering that update obsolete) I'd rather talk about good things.

It's taken a while to get my 'feelers' out into the workplace, but I had a job interview lined up for Friday. Interesting position, interesting company, looked good. Actually, I had an interview on Thursday morning and another on Thursday afternoon, so I was also impressed how quickly the company was moving.

Of course Friday morning at 3am my wife went into labour. If you can find her and talk to her, she can tell you the story of the birth of Finley, but it's perhaps most interesting because it's such a story of positivity. It was a natural birth, with very little pain, and a lot of mental strength from my amazing wife. Holywood's lying to you!  (Surprise!)

We got home at 4pm, with our beautiful son, exhausted, emotional and absolutely thrilled. We ran round like mad tidying the flat, getting everything into position for our new kid.

And I thought I better check my email, because I'd had to cancel the job interview, and I wanted to make sure they knew I wasn't coming. And I had an email. A request for a full. I barely knew how to react, but I sprinted across the flat, into the room where my wife was holding my son, and told them, brimming with pride and excitement.

For budding authors, here's what happened: I sent out a number of queries to American agents, around 250 words, and every time I read the query I thought "this misses the mark..." but I had been so excited to try and persuade them my book was great... well... I jumped the gun.

I also started researching UK agents, who look for a much smaller query, but also ask for the first 2 chapters. I sent a 70 word query to one agent, the synopsis and first 2 chapters, and then decided I should polish it more rather than making the same mistake.

 2 Months after the UK request, I got a request for a full. Which also means the first 2 chapters must be good!  

Needless to say I'm immensely proud. Step 1 of launch achieved. Step 1 of finding a job achieved. And most of all, 'having a family': achievement unlocked.

Rejection agian? Come on...

No, but a different point

I'm very down at the minute because I'm applying for jobs, and going nowhere slowly.  It's taking it's toll, and making my mental robustness for querying on the novel has slipped.  A lot, infact.

Also, I've lost confidence in my query letter.

Finally, I'm strongly considering re-writing the first chapter of my book. 

...

...

...

And kinda lacking the motivation to do it.

On rejection

I saw a post saying you shouldn't blog about the number of rejections you've had. 

Because agents might see you've been rejected, and doubt their own judgement.

I don't want to work with an agent who makes that mistake - and also, I'm trusting that agents are smart enough to know that I could have been rejected for any number of reasons, including a different query letter.

Also, I got my first non-rejection today.  Of sorts.  It was an email saying the agent had decided to stop working as an agent.  That's not a rejection.

I mean yes, you could look at it and say maybe my query letter was so bad it made her throw in the towel...

Onwards and upwards!

on authors

Major reading influences:

Iain M Banks:

Osa Tovaren is Slovakian for wasp factory.  This represents one of the biggest conundrums in my reading life.

Some context:  If you didn't know, Iain M Banks was the finest sci-fi writer since Asimov. (Opinion).  He lived a dual life, writing both sci-fi and modern crime novels.  For Sci-Fi, he wrote as Iain M Banks, and for crime, he ommited the M. 

I have read every single book by Iain M Banks

And not a single page of Iain Banks.  His most famous book, the one that sticks in my mind the strongest was Wasp Factory. 

He's a literary hero, and I would be devastated to find that his crime novels were hum-drum.  I was so attracted to his ability to create complex plots in insanely complex worlds, believable characters, wonderfully integrating AI and high-end technologies into alien cultures all the while telling outstanding stories. 

Could he manage it without the license to create the complexity? 

I've never been brave enough to read The Wasp Factory.